4th month ..... Hypnothise.

so lonq nehr post. Meas nnd bi still qoinq well burt almost brk 1 tyme.
misunderstandinq , aqains. chanqinq bloqskin late.
forqiven yuwen nuerh lerhs . cuz , qive yanlinq face urh .
anws. qort locked up with qeraldine , karyn , chantel , clasie nnd jacq ad cantonment on 20th. ccb , pcb . Knn _l_
pg dhns people saw , cor-ed police. on that day , almost brk with bi .
Haish , sorry bi .

sibeh dulan dhat day ._.
dhns , skh re-open till now , nehr even qho skh .
bo ka lan liaos. need tuu dye back hair . wdf ? heckcare lahr hors.
ccb , who cares already . cher cor-ed meas i also dunch qive a farkinq damn ._.
dhat tyme cor my laopeh . knn . know i single parent still cor.
ccb . laopeh almost send meas in to squat. tmd. honqqan.

Gabriel O.M.S Bi :
Sorry fer dhat day .. 20th , our annivasary yet , i cunch celebrate with euus. i qet locked up . i ain't a qud girlfwen . i'm so sorry . 4 months .. Many quarrells . thouqh is this way , i still love euus as deep as before . my one and only , forever only . i love euus , burt , i trusted euus , i hope euus trust meas too . if there wasn't any trust , we were lying to each other . ): I'm not an actor , i cunch hide my sadness behind me as thouqh thinqs is qoinq smoothly..

well , Bi , since everythinq were fine , i'm yours now , not only now , burt lifetyme. my future ahead as passed on tuu euus , only euus .
Promise meas , you'll never qo . Love euus more than euus noe.

ups nnd downs..

11th , qeraldine akl sist nnd ben ahkor's 1years3months annivasary . last lonq . : )
- went chantel tmm/sist house to mit her nnd karyn .
-niqht , tqt wib them , went tuu mit clasie , viona nnd jacq .
- dhns went tuu mit nelson cuz chantel wnt tuus mit hym : )
- went home ad 3am liek dhats .

12th , started sortinq out wib bi ..
well , i really broke down nnd cried liek hell .. huge cold war , huge pain .. neither can i felt the warmth he once qave .. Treatinq mea liek a fool .. neither duu i believe dhat , yuwen is behind all this ..

Girl , euus are my nuerh.. euus had alwaes helped meas alot in everythinq .. in skh , even outside or maybe in sms/phone cors.. euus qave meas advices , this & dhat .. i appreciated euus so much , doted euus so much .. yet , i'm eurh silly mother tuu think euus wunch talk behind my back tuu my boyfwen , creatinq a mess in our r/s.. whart's this ? euus pleaded meas after i cor-ed euus .. burt , thinqs euus said , e.g : i wunch bea a qreat qirlfwen / i will brk wib my boyfwen anytyme once i found someone i liek .. girl .. whats all this ? since when i will brk ? slowly talk cock alriqhts . i'm already a fool for 3 days .. just 3 days , euus flirt wib my boyfwen . thr's nothinq i can say, no lonqer trustinq euus nnd eurh words .. regretinq of dotinq euus , takinq care of euus. Leonq Yu Wen , euus are officially nothinq tuu meas , nort even my nuerh animore .. thouqh euus are once my beloved nuerh burt still , euus did toos much thinqs behind my back .. how would i ever knoe euus didn't tell others ? i've enuff , "nuerh" . i dunch need such fwen or nuerh . makinq meas a painful niqhtmare/pains . i dunch knoe how tuu even forqive euus or forqet everythinq .. i couldn't even qet tuu sleep .. words appeared in my mind .. so much thinqs we been thru had appeared .. i really miss euus so much as a nuerh burt nevertheless, euus disappointed meas .. from tuuday on , dunch expect a word from meas tuu euus k ? qudbye formal nuerh .



Bi , so disappointed in euus toos .. i didn't knoe euus would believe others nnd nort eurh own qirlfwen . Disappointed meas , i didn't knoe the trust, euus had in meas is so less . nort even more dhans a outsider . i dunch care what euus think of meas . burt , everythinq i said was what i think.. i didn't expect anythinq much from euus ad all .. why ? why are euus treatinq meas this way .. i forqiven euus after sucha huqe quarrell .. yet , cuz of leonqyuwen , euus believed her after the day i forqiven euus ? am i dhat stupid till now , i'm wonderinq how euus qet yuwen numbuh . i think all ways . even of fwenster , msn , fwens , a mit up or maybe , she's the girl euus sent tuu , tuu woodlands.. i juz can't helpinq thinkinq , wonderinq . i cried , cried till it turn swollen , it turns bloody .. nothinq can cover up this bunch of pain.. rememberinq our beautiful memories .. once euus qave meas eurh love/warmth or maybe everythinq.. even how much i disturbed euus , euus would qently kiss meas on my lips .. qivinq meas eurh shoulder whenever i felt liek cryinq .. burt now .. euus poke me thru the heart , hurtinq meas liek a killer . i felt so lost , feel liek endinq everythinq with just a word .. i kept my last breath for euus , leavinq the last word 'i love euus' for euus .. i thouqht our love is qoinq stronq nnd i thouqht i'm stronq enuff tuu face this r/s burt till now .. i dunch knoe what am i duuing all this for ? for what ? euus said once euus trusted meas the most in eurh entire lyfe .. huqe lie ? i'm blinded by it .. if euus really trusted meas the most , i dunch see a reason why euus trusted leongyuwen instead of meas .. isn't it a qreat way tuu proof how fraqile our r/s can bea ? i've seen thru it , understand what euus expressinq .. boy , euus came into my lyfe , nnd euus taken the lead , why are euus tryinq tuu let qho ? why ? euus pleaded meas .. well , this tyme round , i dunch knoe how tuu forqive euus .. sorry . didn't even reply eurh smses.. i didn't knoe how to ; i didn't knoe what to.
Mr.O.. i'll be qone sooner or later ..


- haish , i smoke 2 packets ..
- $20 fly . didn't went out.
- niqht , qeraldine nnd ben came over my house.
- thanks akl sist and ahkor tuu be thr..


13th, feelinq dead of cuz.
- smoke 2 packets liek the day before ..
- nth much tuu elaborate burt viona nnd hazel came my house followed by qeraldine, chantel, yvonne, clasie , sylvia, ben, nelson, karyn nnd jacq.
- thanks quys . thouqh i didnt talked much ..


14th, verge of dyinq .
- 9plus in the morninq , _______ came tuu my house ..
- i didn't let hym in .. burt he stayed out till my laobu is backs.
- he came in , we didn't talk .. haish , sorry bi , i didn't knoe how tuu talked tuu euus or anythinq.
- sorry bi , im really sorry .


15th , processing tuu death .
- stayed ad home till ________ came ..
- this tyme round , i let hym in burt didnt talk ..
- sorry ..


16th , chantel tmm/sist nnd nelson husband 5th month annivasary . last lonq : )
- mit qeraldine ad her house .
-bi , ben , nelson, joshua , qeraldine , karyn nnd chantel came..
- loss of words thouqh . really silent , me.
- sorry quys . i left earlier .
- bi sent meas home nnd he came my house ..
- talked abit ..


17th , thinqs qet better ..
- went karyn house .. did nth .
- sleep/eat/drink/talk cock .
- thns , usual liek yesterday all came. burt i went home tqt wib bi , qeraldine nnd ben.
- all of us stayinq over from tmr to the 19th. toodles.
- bi , iluveuus, thinqs qet better .. luveuus. 20th is our day , luveuus,

im scared ..

I fvckinq miss bi now ) : i wish he's riqht beside meas now D :
Bi , i quoted this portion ferh euuhs , euuhs nnd onlaye euuhs .

Bi , its 9 days before our annivasary .. i felt the coldness euuhs qave meas recently .. i'm so scare euuhs would leave meas euuhs knoe dhat ? i just happened tuu feel dhat , euuhs are ad a far end .. nd , i'm left alone .. eurh smses tuu meas are liek , cold , cold , cold... euuhs didn't mit meas ferh two days.. euuhs didnt asked tuu mit either .. whns i asked euuhs , euuhs said euuhs are busy .. last tyme , euuhs would try eurh best tuu come .. even is ad niqht , after eurh events euuhs would come , burt now , euuhs didn't even asked tuu mit neither cor meas tuu toked on fone tuus. Bi , duu euuhs knoe how i feel now ? i didnt knoe whart tuu duu , boy , had i did anythinq wronq this tyme ? i told euuhs tuuday everythinq , how i felt tuus. burt all euuhs told meas was , sorry , i'm really busy .. i asked euuhs , busy on whart , euuhs told meas , nothinq special on.. duu euuhs knoe how hurt i can beas ? this sentence is just liek , a mother losinq her own child .. losinq her hopes .. i'm really scare tuu lose euuhs .. euuhs didn't even cored meas tuu toked anymore , last tyme euuh duu .. whns each day passes, i think really hard , in fact is qettinq out of my nerves , how cns i make euuhs happy , how tuu beas satisfied.. burt , it seems so hard tuu think .. Or , have euuhs found another girl euuhs are fond of ? I'm really feelinq the hurt as each day passes . i just cunch stop myself from thinkinq recently .. boy , euuhs are liek my everythinq now , burt yet , euuhs are abandoninq meas now .. why ? or eurh feelinqs faded , im really scare .. bi .. iluvveuuhs , burt how much euuhs luvv meas now ? 1/4 ? 1/5 ? 1/2 ? none ? or as before, full ? i'm once in eurh heart , the one and only , burt , do i still takes up dhat space ? or been replaced ? sorry , im really tired , im too scare , im too worried .. thinqs seems qoinq wronq .. i quess , my tears now is flowinq as much as a runninq tap .. bleedinq as deep as an ocean , as painful as a sufferinq dead girl .. leavinq full of sorrys , regrets. feelinq sorrowful .. tkcares' my luvv one , Mr O. ♥

haish , tuuday , went qeraldine house .. i broke down nnd im ad dhe verqe of faintinq liek nows ? haish , thnks qeraldine nnd ben ahkor .
chantel nnd karyn came after dhats , thnks babez. ♥
thouqh , i've neither mood or appetite, euuhs quys tried eurh best tuu cheer meas up nd all.

well , tomorrow's qonna bea qeraldine sist akl nnd ben ahkor's 15th month annivasary .. euuh twos urh , lasted since 12/03/08 already.. last lonq alriqhts my dearest sist. nnd ahkor , treat her well urhs. after celebratinq dhns come find meas buhs. i maybe nort qoinq wit euuhs twos lurh. euuhs should knoe why..
nnd , our sistership is vehr lastinq , luv ♥

Chantel Tmm/Sist, thnks ferh dhats lolipop , : ) Thnks . last lonq wit my qan husband , nelson. lastinq enuff alreadys . since 16/01/09. 5 month alreadys . Luv euuhs sist . Up nnd lows , just qonna tolerate , he's a qreat boyf , great fwen . trust meas , he's really nice . all dhe best , sist . ♥

Karyn bei , cheer ups toos. thouqh euuhs are down tuuday , euuhs still tried tuu cheer meas up .. thnks , luvv euuhs . last lonq wit joshua thouqh is only been a month .. leave dhe past behind , rmbr , he's a nice quy , never missed it . luvv sista ♥

♥♥♥♥♥' gabriel , luvvvvv,

Bi ♥

Clubbinq niqht sucks . Didn't went in cause , it sucks babez. really sucks.
went wit Bi , qeraldine , chantel and jacq . after dhts , ben , nelson , joshua , clasie , karyn , viona nd weijun came . we qho in awhile zao liaoz. saw yutinq dearest ! burt she didn't saw us . lololol.
we went tuu drink ad clark quay. farktard . suay bodoh . nd , Bi is half drunk D: chantel , karyn , clasie , nelson also tou . o.o ( Bi , imissbi now D: )
waited for quite sometime ferh cab , dhns bi cabbed home burt he send meas . ) :

Bi , you drunk still send meas back . D:
thnks bi , mwarks , iluvchuzxxzzxc.
♥ Mr O.

Gabriel here . Baby , ily .

Lol . Baby is still sleeping . Shall just randomly post for her . Bored siak .
Baby is like a pig now :o but i still love her , sweet right ? Baby , wake up .
Gabriel O.M.S misses you , Mrs.T D: wake up . wake up . wake up .

Spammers in this blog .
Don't bother to spam . It doesn't affect us . Affect my love towards her .
Stfu , we'll be really jumping for joy ^^

Okay baby , me love you a million , no , not even numbers couldnt count :)
Muaks baby , baby i love you . Mrs.T ♥

Garbriel, ♥

qabriel bi , after all the rainy and stormy weather , misunderstandinqs and conflicts , i quess this is eurh last chance nnd , we'll last without much quarrell alrights . Bi , i love euuhs , it'll last , i swear , mwarks. ♥ Mr. O.

Finally , i went out : ) qeraldine cor-ed meas out , cabbed down her place. slack ad there ferh couple hours. waited ferh Clasie, Jacqueline, chantel, Karyn, Joshua , Ben, nelson, viona and yvonne. they sibeh kua zhanq siahhs. dhns , after dhat , went down cwp . Bi came .
bouqht somethinqs dhns went chantel block nearby slack .
after dhats, all qoinq home chanqed so , i went bi house .
We're still abit cold thouqh . Bi now bathing : ) Waiting ferh hym come out : ) Lolololol.
dhns , later leaving tuu mit thems after i bath : )

♥ Bi , i'm sorry ferh all this while ) :
14 more days , 4th month . luvvvvvvvv ♥

sex-rockalcohol is backs :P

6plus liek dhat , bi nnd i walked over chantel house dhrs mit them. nelson damn dsiao. make meas larff dao penqs ! funny hym :D Chantel also larf dao so cute : )
nnd , i saw sky nnd botak !! so lonq nehr see them . ) : Liek 12345678987654321 years already ) : dhey mitinq manqtinq nnd joey D: i miss them toos ! D;

headed tuu boonlay cause dunch knoe qho dhrs qet whart . qet lerh , went karyn house. slack till niqht tymme , went down had dinner . Lolololol : )
Mother cor-ed meas while eatinq , i thouqht whart happen in the end tell meas tuu buy thinqs back . Lolzxzxxzzx. eat liaos, all went qeraldine house . alonq the way , somethinq happened. haiyoohs , bi ahks. relac abit mahs .
Slack ad qeraldine house till 11 liek dhat , bi send meas home dhns he sleepinq over. he's riqht beside meas ! :D Biiiiiiiii , akucintabi ♥

♥ Mr.O

nnd, jiabin BFF ♥,
i quess you're the first person dhat qet tuu see meas ferh past few days/weeks. without eurh words, i think now, i still wunch think .
thanks bff, thouqh , you're inside , i still appreciate euuhs.
i'll appreciate thinqs i had now. remember whart i say toos. :'D
next year january you'll come out lerhs. : ) Imissyou ok BFF . : )

Geraldine Hunny/Akl Sist.♥, chantel LuvSista ♥, Clasie boyfwen ♥, Jacqueline Precious ♥, Karyn Bei ♥ ,Viona laoqonq ♥ and Yvonne mentos ♥ ,
sorry , din reply euuhs burt still , euuhs came over my house : )
i can never find any best sisters liek euuhs quys , i really luv euuhs quys alot alriqhts.

nort forqetinq my other fwens liek JASON , WEIJUN , Sylvia, vivian, nelson, ben, sky, botak, joey, cindy , ken, ahloy, ahboy, etc. many more, cunch recall D;
burtt , i luv euuhs quys alotttt ♥

♥♥♥♥♥/} Gabriel , my luv.

Mr O. ♥

Still MIA-ING .
kept in the dark , never knowing whu you're, whu i am.

qabriel bi, i knoe euuhs still tried tuuh contact meas every sinqle days. burt i still cunch take it. somehow, euuhs dunch need ta knoe whu told meas, someone saw euuhs qho woodlands wib a qirl. amazinq enuff , i came tuu knoe it . i even knew other stuffs, burt din wannarh say much .. hais D: Bi, why are euuhs still deceiving meas . Or am i not fit ferh euuhs ?Am i askinq tuu much ? I had been thinkinq thinqs recently .. I realise i needed euuhs alort. burt, i just cunch believe thinqs i knoe nnd saw. Gabriel onq minq shenq , tell meas how, tell meas what tuu duu. euuhs told meas thinqs which i came tuu knoe it wasnt true ? i'm really bursting or maybe exploding... i really had tuu much thinqs to say. Pathetic meas , i cunch even use words tuu tell euuhs thinqs i wannarh say. i woke up in the morninq , i really hope i can feel eurh love aqain , hold onto euuhs aqain . all i think about is you , it take more than once , not knowing whart tuu duu. baby , tell me how you want meas tuu tell euuhs . 'cause thats what i wannarh duu , only thinq i wannarh duu . i cunch feel the trust , the love aqain. where's the unconditional love ? The porch lies in the bottom, while headliqhts flickered thru the blind nnd lies. i can never find love just liek this , never . the qentle kisses on my lips nnd cheeks , it seems forever last tyme , burt whns it turned out tuu bea , lie . i once thouqht euuh bind tuu bea mine forever , burt its all a pathetic lie i came tuu knoe. i've once felt dhat eurh L.O.V.E was really meant tuu bea mine , never be shared. burt now, i feel dhat other qirls are sharing you toqether wib meas. i dunch liek this feelinq.. You've kidnapped my heart once , tiqhtly , burt whns euuhs hurt meas once , i cunch forqive nnd forqet dhats easily .. it takes a lonq tyme tuuh recover . Besides , more thinqs i heard , the more i cant forqet thinqs cause i knoe , eurh heart still doesnt belonq tuuh meas.. somehow, i think everythinq had turn the other way round . never blame them ferh tellinq meas , cause it isnt their fault .. furthermore , they couldnt even contact meas.. I'm sorry , i'm sorry ferh people whu qho tuu euuhs nnd spout nonsense nnd scolded euuhs . i din knoe till recently .. i'm really sorry . is nort eurh fault , this is whart i wannarh duu , my idea. not eurhs , i'm sorry . im really am . Sorry , i've put euuhs into difficult position. i dunch blame euuhs if euuhs hate meas now or anythinq .. well , bi , if euuhs really wannarh leave meas now , i wunch blame euuhs .. i had euuhs once, love euuhs once , qet tuu love euuhs once . Bi , i love euuhs just like before ad eurh finqer tips , dearest Mr.O. ♥

nnd quys ,
thanks ferh concerning meas . burt please , i beq euuh quys , never start scoldinq hymm anymore , it'll make meas feel more quilty , more pain. the pain are really never bea defined by words . i appreciated euuh quys alort , miss euuh quys alort tuu. burt i quess , i felt more miserable by all this thinqs .. thanks people , i dunch demand ferh more anymore.. whns its tyme , thinqs will bea proved ..
♥ luvvv,

had been thinkinq thinqs recently , thats all.